


Sabriel v. Destiel

by using_this_name



Series: Crackity Crack [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Car Sex, Crack, Crossdressing, Drabble, Humor, Light Bondage, M/M, Pie, Profound Bond, Shower Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-12
Updated: 2013-05-12
Packaged: 2017-12-11 16:06:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/800573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/using_this_name/pseuds/using_this_name
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A brief explanation of why Sabriel is better than Destiel, even though Sabriel makes no sense.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sabriel v. Destiel

 

** Sabriel **

*Gabriel snaps his fingers and Sam is wearing very little. What he is wearing is lacy.*

 **Sam:** Why are you even here? I was busy angsting. And you are, like, a character that is never onscreen with me.

 **Gabriel:** Whatevs. You are tall. I like tall men.

 **Sam:** K. But I’m gonna angst instead. Also, I like tall men, too. Bitch.

*Gabriel turns Sam’s hair purple.*

 **Sam:** *cries* Purple was Jess’ favorite color.

 **Gabriel:** Let’s have sex.

 **Sam:** Kk. Just warning you, I may make sad eyes at you the whole time.

 **Gabriel:** No problem. I brought a blindfold. And handcuffs. And this ball gag. You know what, let’s go with the gimp suit.

 **Sam:** Mmmfgjgfmmmm!?!

** Destiel **

**Dean:** *opens door* Sam, you may not want to go out to the car for a while. It’s airing out. And I’ve got this crick in my—OH GOD! What are you doing?!? You said you were just going to angst, and now you’re…not that I mind watching, but…why do you keep having sex with non-humans?

 **Cas:** You know, Dean, I am also non-human.

 **Dean:** …but you said we have a profound bond.

 **Cas:** I just said that so that you would have intercourse with me….

 **Gabriel:** You guys mind piping down? I was in the middle of something.

 **Sam:** Mmmgjgfjhm!!!!

 **Dean:** Also, those sheets look nice. Can I…?

 **Gabriel:** No! *snaps them, and the bed, most importantly the bed, out of there*

 **Dean:** Man! Oh well. Cas, want to go have sex in the tiny motel shower? It will probably be really awkward, but I really need it after that pie you spilled on my—

 **Cas:** I like being close to you.

 **Dean:** Is that a yes?

 **Cas:** Yes, I would like to deepen our bond.

 **Dean:** Dude, you can’t use a line after you’ve told me it’s a line!

 **Cas:** I apologize. I will remember that for next time.

 **Dean:** Whatever. Take your pants off.


End file.
